Progress Report

    Ashes to ashes, dust to dust if they are from you past just ride on. Not the most poetic I know. However it could be a good life motto not on the level of Van Wilder  “You shouldn't take life too seriously…you'll never get out alive.” but a decent one. 

     I noticed a friend on FB is friends with someone from my past. I was about to ask how they knew this person but I stopped myself. You see I realized it does not matter. I don't care to have that conversation or commit time or energy to there memory. That my friends is progress. 

     Life it is a changing, mine already has so much. I joined a singles group a while back but purely for friends and socialization. I ended up finding a new job as well but that is my life it never has been normal. Things tend to be interesting and most changes good or bad happen fast. 

     I have been doing this cool thing called not dating. Focusing solely on myself, my daughter and work with some time for friends. It has been amazing. I still have my lonely this shit sucks days but they are fewer and fewer. 

     My work life is better than I could have ever dreamed of. My daughter gets to come to work with me on the days my time with her and work overlaps. It is truly a family affair at work. We actually closed early on Saturday to go enjoy a festival happening in SLC. The owner just paid for 6 months of personal training for me. Never asked for it, it just happened. I feel so very valued at my job and it is an amazing feeling. 

     I have been taking time for me doing what I want to do when I want to or can do it. I recently traded Felicia my Jeep for two wheels and the open road. Being my first bike the open road has not happened yet but I did spend some time in the church parking lot today. 

     For those this shit sucks days I do have some amazing people in my life in my corner. That helps with the suck it really does. Like I have always said it is not time that heals all wounds it is what you do with that time. Today it was sleeping, riding and an absolutely ridicules dance off in the living room with Seppi. That made for a good day and I have no regrets about how my day was spent. 

     I have been keeping my heart, hands and naughty bits to myself and I can't complain about the outcome. Falling in love with myself has always been a dream and a goal. for once it is not just lip service but action happening. I am not the party animal I was and that is 100% ok. 

    Building my life day by day is an adventure, I say building and not re building because there is nothing in the past I need to build with today. My charity organization is closed, my past romantic interests are in the past safely tucked away far from the now. It really is just me and that amazing tiny human of mine and for once that is ok. This really might be what family looks like for me and I have no desire to try and change that any time soon. 

     I have made the healthy choices that I mentally needed to and that my friends is amazing. I even learned how to sleep in the middle of the giant bed some nights! I have two amazing things I am looking forward to. Reading the Tiny Human stories tomorrow and a karaoke night for me on Thursday. I could not be happier. That is all for now and I should head to bed work comes early.